Distracted.
Letting Go 9
"Please
take me to the temple...son" pleaded
the old man as he lay his head on Rudra's lap, grateful for the reprieve and
this stranger who held him. The traffic had come to a standstill but no one
else came forward to help, "Somebody else will take you" Rudra looked around hoping someone
would come forward, his mind still pre-occupied by Paro's disappearance and
this overwhelming need to see her before his eyes; he did not need any
distractions at this point. Certainly not of the kind that held him back
and let her drift further away.
"You are a
man of the uniform, how can you deny a dying man his last wish?"the
truth in those words demanded Rudra's attention prying them away from the
thoughts of Paro and away from his own restlessness. Rudra had no choice but to
acknowledge the truth as it stared back at him. It came as a bit of a rude
shock therefore, to himself - his callous response to someone who was obviously
in need of help, granted he was dealing with a personal crisis but hadn't he
vowed his life to serve the country? Had Paro become so important, above everything
else that he had thought about overlooking the needs of a dying man? It did not take long for the
thoughts to stray back to Paro though.
"You are
wasting precious time..." the
old man's wise words roused him out of his reverie once again. Time was
precious to both, Rudra whose life was drifting away and to his man, who was
literally gasping for breath, very little precious moments for both of them to
spare.
Rudra looked at him almost thoughtfully and then back
up towards the road ahead longingly, noticing the sun had completely
disappeared behind the hills, and how the darkness was now fast spreading
across the land; gone was the mesmerizing hue that had lit up the evening sky
only moments' ago. It felt like the sun that had vanished taking away the
light, just like Paro had.
"I was in
a rush..." said
Rudra, more to convince himself than anything else, "I
have been walking on this road for a while, but no one came to my help, you are
the first who has come forward" replied
the man.
Rudra was in two minds but years of training and his
inherent goodness would not allow him to leave this helpless man stranded
the middle of the road to die, "The evening aarti is
about to start, please take me there..." he
pleaded this time and yet strangely enough there was no pain in that voice.
Rudra studied the face intently, and those eyes as they looked back at his own,
seemed to look through him and focus at the one that Rudra religiously hid from
the rest of the world- through the hard shell that Rudra thought he was, that
the world saw him to be... onto the one that Paro looked at every time she did,
so did he.
"Alright,
let's get you there" Rudra
helped him get up. About half way there, the old man tried to strike a
conversation, "you are a good man..." he spoke his eyes focussed on the
lights of the temple. Before Rudra could respond though, he was distracted by
the shrill of his cell phone, "Yes Aman?" Rudra asked eagerly, hoping there was
something good at the other end.
"Sir..." Aman's
hesitation was a quick dampener on all those happy thoughts, "I
have some bad news..." he
said, unsure how to break it to his boss, "Kya hai Aman, bol.." even as he held on to the man by
his left hand and walked with him at a slow pace to the temple, "Sir
wohh Bhabhisa..."
"Paro...Kya
hua usse?"
"Its not
that Sir...the bus just arrived at the station" Aman said
choosing his words carefully.
"And..." Rudra stopped
at the base of the singl flight of steps that led to the temple's plinth,
unable to shrug off the sense of unease that spread through him, "Jaldi bol Aman, Paro theek hai?"
"Sir, she
was not in the bus" Aman
said, "May be she went somewhere
else?"Doubting whether Rudra had been right in his assumption, are you
sure she went to Birpur? He meant to say.
"Theek se
dekh Aman...she has to be in that bus" he
didn't realize when let go of the old man or when he began to pace the width of
the steps in a nervous panic,"Damn it
Aman...I'm going to Birpur, tell them to re-check"
"Can
you...?" Rudra
turned back to talk to the old man but he was gone! Horrified that he had
fallen out of his hold after the phone call, Rudra went back a few paces,
looked to the sides by the shrubs, and the tress, but the man was nowhere in
sight,"Take me to the temple..." had been his words, but he was no
where on those steps that led to the top where the temple stood either.
It was almost like he had vanished!
In his panic, he raced up the steps to check up on the
man but found only a few people waiting patiently as the priest prepared the
evening aarti. Rudra stood outside the temple plinth, unable to figure out how
the man had simply vanished!
He turned around as the height provided a better view
of the surrounding land but there was no trace of him. There was only a hint of
a breeze and the odd lights from moving vehicles on the road ahead. A slightly
flustered Rudra was just about go back down, when a voice stopped him, "The
aarti is about to start, come in"the priest - awaiting
Rudra's response was whom Rudra noticed first when he turned around. Then
the few people gathered there began to turn towards him, one by one almost as
if they were eager to see this source of distraction which had delayed their
aarti.
The last one to turn was her, those eyes he knew all
too well, widened in shock as she registered his presence.
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